A perplexing question for pet parents is what to do when their pet reaches the end of its life. As we are charged with being the advocates and protectors of our pets in this world, we can’t help but wonder if the choices we make on their behalf are fair, humane, and compassionate. I can’t go in.
When the time comes for you and your pet to face these difficult questions, Colleen Ellis of Two Hearts Pet Loss Center and the International Animal Hospice and Palliative Care Association is here to help. As an educator, leader, and entrepreneur in the end-of-life pet care industry, Colleen believes that much of pet hospice care begins with permission. Whatever it is, it’s about performing a ritual after death. ”
But what is animal hospice or palliative care?
In a gentle yet authoritative tone, Colleen explains that many pet parents already provide hospice care for their dying pets, but simply don’t have a way to explain it.
“When I talk about animal hospice, many pet parents say to me, ‘Oh my god, I didn’t even know that, but that’s what I did at the end of my cat’s life!’ took her home and made her comfortable. I didn’t know I was doing that, and I didn’t even know there was a word for it.”
In what can feel like a very confusing and uncertain process, Colleen and the professionals she teaches help guide you through the final days, weeks, and even months of your pet’s life. Regain dignity and control to pet parents. Pet hospice provides formal instruction and direction at the end of a pet’s life, thus giving them the freedom to make informed choices.
“It’s called a care plan. A good animal hospice program is made up of veterinarians, veterinary nurses, and emotional people like myself. There’s a multidisciplinary team whose role is to get your pet closer to the end of the process. We have some kind of care plan that educates parents. At least their eyes are wide open when we approach this issue.”
With a care plan and a multidisciplinary team, pet parents can have some idea of what the final stages of their pet’s life will be.
“A care plan takes away the fear of the unknown,” says Colleen.
So, is the role of a hospice care professional to act as a kind of translator between medical or death care professionals and pet parents?
As Colleen explains, hospice professionals “can serve as a liaison in that process between the veterinarian, veterinary nurse, and pet family.” They become the family’s eyes and ears. , is very focused on observing the family verbally and non-verbally. “Sir, I don’t think your family understood what you just said, because you can see in their eyes that they didn’t. So, let me tell you what you just said.” they might say.
Pet hospice care also provides a way for pet families to avoid regret, the enemy of grief.
“Guided by an expert like me, I said, ‘Tell me about his life. Let’s understand all the things that made his life special. And when you look back six months later, you’re like, Let’s do those things so we can say, ‘And we finished on time, so I have no regrets.” — That’s always my goal. ”
Colleen emphasizes that it is the job of pet hospice professionals to recognize cues from pet parents and help them deal with the questions that come with the end of a pet’s life. Again, the idea of ”permission” is the greatest gift to pet hospice professionals.
“What I love about my role is being able to give them (pet parents) permission. Permission to do things the way they want. Permission to request things to be done the way I want them to be. If you don’t want to put your baby in a garbage bag, just say, “I don’t want my baby in a garbage bag.” Please tell them! You can do that! ”
In some cases, it’s the hospice professional’s job to help pet parents figure out the real questions they want to ask.
“I always laugh because sometimes professionals — even in hospice — say, ‘Oh!’ When someone calls and says, ‘Can you give me a price?’ I hate it.”
“And I say, ‘They don’t know what else to ask you.’ They have no idea what else to ask you, so calling and asking for the price is not their best option. It’s safe because the only thing we can all talk about is what the dollar means.
“Your role is to say, ‘First let’s talk about what’s going on, and then we’ll give you a price.’ But tell us what’s going on with your baby. What do you want?” ‘Now we can start a productive conversation, but they don’t know what else to ask.’
Image credit: fizkes, Shutterstock
What resources are available for pet parents seeking hospice or palliative care for their pets?
Colleen recommends starting by visiting the International Association for Animal Hospice and Palliative Care website (IAAHPC.org). If you still don’t get the help you want, we recommend contacting your veterinarian. “Veterinarians often provide this service, but they may simply not advertise it or talk about it.”
When contacting someone about pet hospice or palliative care, Colleen recommends asking, “Do you offer hospice services for animals?”
“If it were me, I would go back to the person who called me and say, ‘Tell me what that means to you.'” What does it mean to have hospice services? If they say, “Okay, we’ll be present for the euthanasia,” that’s probably not what you want. ”
She emphasizes not letting anyone force you to “jump the needle” if you and your pet aren’t ready.
If I learned nothing else from my conversation with Colleen, it’s that no one should ever try to steal from you or your pet the right to a safe, loving, and dignified end when the time comes. That is not the case.
This seems like a relatively simple truth, but it can be difficult to understand when pet parents face pressure from friends, family, and even some veterinarians. But this is Colleen’s job. It’s about giving pets and pet parents the gift of a final journey together. Pet hospice simply helps pave the way.
“You give them permission, you give them the support to do it, and now all of a sudden it becomes this beautiful journey.”
For more information and a list of animal hospice and palliative care providers, please visit the IAAHPC Providers Directory on the IAAHPC website. For more information about animal hospice and palliative care consulting, education, and professional grief education, visit the Two Hearts Pet Loss Center website. Read the book “Pet Parents: A Journey Through Unconditional Love and Grief” by Colleen Ellis. You can also find Two Hearts Pet Loss Center on Facebook.
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