DENVER — If travel nurse Alexis Mathews met sprinkler company owner Alex Walker on a dating app, they probably wouldn’t find much in common.
“I’m 28 years old. I moved here a year ago,” Matthew said. “I mainly use dating apps, and sometimes I meet people outdoors, but mostly on dating apps.”
Matthew is more liberal, while Walker is more conservative.
“I’ll be joining the National Guard in January and going through basic training,” Walker said.
But what they have in common is that political differences with potential partners make it increasingly difficult to find a mate.
Research shows that young men and women are growing closer politically, with many unwilling to cross ideological divides.
“If you don’t agree with them politically, there’s nothing you can do about it,” Matthew said.
“It was a little harder to find women who were more conservative and had the same beliefs as me,” Walker added.
Widening gender disparity
When it comes to Gen Z, a recent Gallup poll found that while men are moving to the right, women are moving to the left politically.
A 2023 study from the American Enterprise Institute shows that 46% of white Gen Z women identify as liberal, compared to just 28% of men who identify as liberal.
gallup
Jeremy Castle, an associate professor of political science at Metropolitan State University in Denver, said much has changed since former President Donald Trump entered politics.
“What we’ve seen where we’ve seen social issues play a bigger role in these differences between men and women is actually the Supreme Court’s decision that ultimately overturned Roe v. Wade and Donald Trump’s “It’s only been in the last 10 years, with the election of Trump and the Women’s March, that women are talking about politics,” Castle said.
not crossing the watershed
These differences are most evident on dating apps, where people are reportedly increasingly categorizing their matches based on political affiliation.
Matthew, who doesn’t list his political affiliation on dating apps, is one of those who uses that tactic. She spoke about LGBTQ rights and abortion access.
“But I judge people based on what they put in[the app],” Matthew said. “If they say ‘conservative’ on the dating app and they look conservative…I’m not going to match with them.”
she is good company. In a 2023 survey, 65% of Democrats said they were less likely to date a Republican, and 62% of Republicans surveyed said they were less likely to date a Democrat.
Alex Walker falls into that group. He said he would consider dating a liberal woman.
“It’s hard to find conservative women right now,” Walker said.
He said he recently spoke to a woman who identifies as a liberal and appears to be a strong feminist.
“And I felt powerless in this relationship,” he said.
look beyond the label
The bottom line, says Galina Rose, a research professor at the University of Denver, is that there’s an imbalance in that many daters don’t like to swipe right across party lines.
“It’s become a really big issue for people,” says Rose, who studies what makes couples work.
She warns that political labels don’t always reflect actual values.
“The things we emphasize, especially on dating apps, may not be the most important thing,” Rose said. “So you might say, ‘I don’t date anyone under 6 feet tall,’ but in reality, if you meet someone in person who’s 5 feet 6 (inches) tall, you might actually be a good match.” Good for you, but if you don’t give that person a chance to truly connect and understand who they are at their core, you’re missing out. ”
Rose said research has shown that people who identify politically tend to have less conflict in their marriages, but there are significant differences in couples’ happiness and well-being, including how they manage differences and how they communicate. He said there are many other factors that influence whether a couple stays together.
Agree to disagree?
But for many people, it’s more complicated than agreeing to disagree.
“They feel like they can still be friends even if they have different opinions,” Matthew said. “But if your brother wants to get married and you’re trying to prevent that from happening, that’s a bigger problem for me and I can’t just object.”
Mr Walker agreed that this was a matter of deeply held beliefs that affected families.
“I’m a Christian and I believe what’s written in the Bible,” he said. “If you have a man who is too feminine, you won’t get anywhere. You won’t have a strong family.”
Still, it’s also important to remember that people can change their minds. Research shows that couples tend to be closer ideologically, Castle said.
One MSU Denver student said his current wife had a big influence on his politics.
“Actually, it was my wife who pulled me to the left. I guess I was more of a center-right conservative,” Alan Ash said. “Sometimes they’re right, and sometimes you’re right.”
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