A mother has given us a glimpse into the painful but sometimes hilarious reality of when her young child experiences sleep regression.
No part of raising a child is easy, but the first year certainly takes a toll on moms and dads when it comes to sleep.
A survey of 1,300 parents by nursery furniture and bedding company Snuz found that parents lost an average of 133 nights of sleep during their newborn’s first year of life.
Sleep regression is a big part of that. Repeated awakenings, crying, fussing, and disliking bedtime itself are all hallmarks of the dreaded sleep regression. Some suggest that these regressions are caused by developmental milestones.
Either way, they can cause havoc for parents, as Rachel Seward, a first-time mom from Bognor Regis in West Sussex, UK, can attest.
“Thomas was a pretty good sleeper until he had his first sleep regression at about 4 months old,” Seward told Newsweek. “Since then, every sleep regression that can affect an infant has affected him…and we have been affected too! You will start sleeping better again for weeks or months.”
She said Thomas’ sleep regressions tended to fall into one of two different categories.
“Some of the sleep regressions were having trouble waking up in the middle of the night multiple times, and some were having a hard time getting him back to sleep for a long time,” Seward said. “Honestly, I don’t know which is worse.”
Wanting a glimpse into the chaos they face each night, Seward uploaded a video of her husband trying to put Thomas to bed on TikTok under the handle @miscarriageandme.
It was a trying experience for the sleep-deprived father, who was forced to struggle with his son to calm him down.
“18 month sleep regression is definitely here,” she wrote next to the clip. “When you’re a parent and you’re in the thick of it, it’s hell. But you have to admit, from the outside looking in, it’s pretty funny.”
A baby monitor captures Rachel Seward’s toddler experiencing sleep regression. Mum Rachel shares the reality of tackling her nighttime routine. A baby monitor captures Rachel Seward’s toddler experiencing sleep regression. Mum Rachel shares the reality of tackling her nighttime routine. TikTok/Miscarriage and me
“Even though he was physically tired, he just couldn’t seem to turn off his brain and get him to sleep, so we spent about an hour most nights trying to get him to sleep,” Seward said. But like in the video, it felt like most of that time was spent struggling with him rolling over, turning, and climbing on our heads. Ta!”
Seward regularly posts on TikTok and hasn’t shied away from showing off the highs and lows of her parenting journey, including trying to conceive and having a miscarriage.
She said that while the situation is stressful, she decided to share the video to show that there is a bright side to the chaos that nighttime brings.
“My husband and I take turns setting bedtimes, especially during sleep regressions, which can be very exhausting and really test your patience as parents,” she said.
She’s passionate about removing the “stigma” from so many parenting topics and hopes her videos will help others realize they’re not alone in fighting these battles. I hope this helps.
The good news for her is that Thomas is now 20 months old and seems to be overcoming some of his sleep regression issues. For her, this is a reminder of her best advice for new parents. “Everything is a phase.”
“Right now it’s tough and exhausting and it seems like it’s never going to end, but it will end and it will get better,” she said.
If your family has a dilemma, let us know at life@newsweek.com. You can seek advice from experts and your story may be featured in Newsweek.
