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Dear care and food,
I’m not sure how it started, but my 9-year-old daughter’s school has a campfire story meme thing going on.
Legend has it that a demonic deer lives in the woods on the outskirts of town and occasionally eats other deer, as well as pets and people who wander far from the end of the houses. “Patty” is so seriously into it that she often repeats small details and imparts wisdom to other children, such as how to keep demon deer from entering town because she’s scared of television.
My wife just came up with a list of “demands” for our sex life. I’m a little speechless. I discovered something terrible about my brother-in-law. I don’t know if I should tell you. My mother-in-law has very strange ideas about helping her daughter’s “purpose.” My wife told me that I would always be “second” to my first love. he is long dead.
It’s harmless and I think it has something to do with Halloween coming up soon. However, I don’t know how someone at her school created this electronic photo of the devil deer, but it’s so popular that they had it made. The holey horns and red eyes that look like they’re chasing you are really creepy. Patty was of course very happy and printed out several copies. She asked permission to put one in her room and the other in the refrigerator in the kitchen.
At first I agreed, but after a few days at home, it got pretty unpleasant, so I deleted it and threw it in the trash. Patty was upset and always teased me for being a scared cat. I’m trying to take the high road here and ignore her, but it’s getting harder and harder and she won’t let this go. How can I understand her feelings?
-Hi
Dear Yak
Tell Patty that it’s okay to like what you like, even if it’s creepy, but it’s okay if others don’t like it. Explain in no uncertain terms that it is not acceptable to tease others about their preferences, regardless of their age. Ask her how she acts with the kids at school who don’t find deer funny, and if she calls her friends scared of cats, what does that say about her personality? Please.
Then I reiterate that I’m not policing her interests and that she’s more than welcome to put the demented deer in her room and talk about it with her friends. But if you observe teasing about it, there will be consequences. At the end of the day, this isn’t about campfire nonsense, it’s about respect for others.
—Alison
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My friends “Dan” and “Sarah” do some kind of gentle parenting with their 4 year old. This is not my job, but since I was laid off they will be living with me. I know it’s not a great plan, but I don’t have a choice. Anyway, I was at a BBQ and their kid ran out into the road and they didn’t say anything about it being dangerous, just grabbed him and turned him around.
